How giving ourselves permission to grieve assists healing.
Grief is a natural response to loss. The more significant the loss is to you, the more intense your grief might be. Many people associate grieving with the death of a loved one, but other losses such as a relationship breakup, job loss, miscarriage, retirement, death of a pet, significant injury, relocation, loss of financial security or a cherished dream can all lead to a feeling of grief. If and how you feel grief depends on your own values, dreams and goals or how deeply you feel.
Whatever your loss, it’s personal to you, so don’t feel ashamed about how you feel, or believe that it’s somehow only appropriate to grieve for certain things.
I recently lost a treasured pet, my beautiful cat Felix; he lived with me for 15 years and was a wonderful source of unconditional love, daily cuddles and regular chats ( I'm not the only one who talks to their cat. Right?) I was very blessed because I got to hold him in my arms as he passed away at home. I stayed strong and calm so he could leave feeling the gentle love I had always given him. But then came the grief.
I called my daughter immediately after he passed away and her closing words to me were "take your time and let yourself grieve". It's interesting how those words stayed with me during the following days and I actually gave myself permission to grieve in any way I needed. I did little rituals, prepared a lovely resting place for him in the garden, wrote him a letter, made an album of photos, meditated a lot, and cried a lot too. I even called the vet for a bit of a debrief about the process. It felt so good, to sit with the pain, to acknowledge it, and to express myself in whatever way felt right for me at the time. This is where the healing began.
This got me thinking about people I know who seem to be resistant to allowing themselves to deeply feel emotion. One person in particular, after the death of a family member, kept as busy as possible to 'push through' the grief. I get that, it would be one way to cope. But does that allow you to acknowledge why you are feeling the way you do or to express your emotions? Will that hold the grief internally, to come out at a later time?
For me meditation and mindfulness practices were critical to the healing process; just sitting quietly and reflecting, allowing and acknowledging my emotions, and giving myself permission to feel and process. As one of my lovely neighbors said, "let those tears flow, Felix deserves them." Yes indeed he did. And so did I. xx
#permissiontogrieve #meditation #mindfulness #selflove #selfcare #healthymind #strongmind #strongandcentred #meditationbunyip #meditationstudiobunyip
Comments